Doctor Who Review: 1-2 "The End of the World"

(Spoilers!)

Brief synopsis: The Doctor takes Rose to the future in order to show off how far special effects have come since 1989. Rose meets a bitchy trampoline and the Earth gets destroyed.

Five Words: Hitchhiker's Guide to Doctor Who.

Introductions: Cassandra, The Face of Boe, Psychic Paper, Magic Cellphone

REVIEW

The first episode, Rose, was just a warm-up for this. Russell T. Davies mixes the formula and characters of Doctor Who with the fun-loving absurdism of The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, noting that the best possible way to kick off a sci-fi serial is to destroy the Earth. Davies, of course, doesn't have to commit to it for the rest of his series the way Adams (mostly) did, but it still sends the same message: Forget this dull little place you call home. We're going places.

There's a lot of great character moments in this one. Rose's attack of culture shock is well-done and very believable. She's interesting and relatable throughout the episode, a good sign for things to come. The best bit for the Doctor is not any of the grim, melancholy foreshadowing stuff - it's when he smiles as he says "That's not supposed to happen."

There are a few flaws. Rose doesn't have much to do during the climax. Jabe is killed by a Legend of Zelda puzzle. Cassandra is about as threatening as a pop tart. But none of this impedes the momentum of the story. To put it simply, if you aren't hooked after this, you're watching the wrong show. This is the episode that sets the standard and the tone for the season, and to some extent for the entire show. The plot's a little flimsy, but the performances, effects, sets and costumes are all dynamite.

IN RETROSPECT

The psychic paper shows up for the first time here. It's essentially the social engineering version of the sonic screwdriver, and that's just cool. If anything, it deserves to get used more often than it does. I'm sure you can open at least as many doors with psychic paper, and you can do a lot of other interesting things with it too.

The bit at the end, when the Doctor and Rose go back to the present time and have that quiet little moment of fear, mourning and fast food - that may be the all-time best scene in Doctor Who. The high sci-fi future and everything that happened there is made all the more poignant by the sudden return to normality.

THE BIGGER PICTURE

This episode takes a moment to explain the language issue - that is, why do all the aliens in the universe speak English - which as far as I know has never been addressed on Doctor Who before. And thankfully, it's a good and beautiful example of how to work a nerdy explanation into your story. Unlike, say, George Lucas, who chooses stupid things to explain and wastes your time doing it, here Russell T. Davies quickly informs us that the TARDIS has a universal translator that works by remote, further adding: It's a psychic thing, don't worry about it. Which Rose does, of course, which is great because it moves the plot ahead and justifies the explanation being in the episode. Perfect exposition. Gold star.

Although Doctor Who has always used time travel chiefly as an excuse to change settings every episode rather than for its more complex storytelling possibilities, there are hints in this episode that the new series is going to at least raise some questions from time to time. "Five billion years later," Rose muses, "my mum's dead." That kind of unnerving realization brings the whole story to life, more even than costumes and effects.

FIRSTS

First hints of D9's Enormous Angst. Yeah, there was a reference to the time war when he was talking to the Nestene Consciousness but he didn't really have time to brood about it then.

First Last of the Time Lords, and maybe also the first verification that this is really a continuation of the series and not a reboot.

First instance of a computer scan taking just long enough to provide a touching moment.

First questionable use of a pop song.

First instance of the Doctor having all kinds of fun and then being sad at the end because people died.

First heart-string plucking use of Rose's theme.

SCOREKEEPING

Does the Doctor save the day in this one? Yes. Good ass-kicking episode for D9. He saves Rose and most of the aliens on Platform One, and takes down the villain rather gruesomely while he's at it.

Semi-Companion: Jabe

Nice Person Who Talks to Rose and Dies: Rafallo

Best Scenes: "She's dead now" and the ending.

Best joke: The iPod that plays classical music.

Most emotional: Rose's theme.

WTF Factor: 5.5/Apple/26 is the first time in the series you can just about hear Russell laughing at you because he knows that you know that there is no possible justification for making an actor say anything that weird.

Woeful Cliche: The Countdown of Death, although I can't complain too much because it actually makes sense in the story. It's used about as well as it could be, too - It starts up before there's any danger, and of course we know it's going to be a Countdown Of Death, but the Doctor and Rose don't know that, which is good tension-building stuff.

Personal Confuser: The Steward's computer has a "Kill Me Horribly" button. Shouldn't there be a little window that pops up to ask "Are you sure?"

Surprise Time Lord Super Power #1: Bullet Time. I like that he takes a little moment of Zen to do it. And really, if you call yourself a Time Lord it shouldn't be any big deal to shift your perception of time.

And the Big Episode Rating List:

1. The End of the World

2. Rose

Doctor Who Review: 1-1 "Rose"

Spoiler note: I will spoil the episode in this review and talk a bit about how it fits into the series but I'll try not to give away too much about future episodes so if you haven't watched the series already you can follow along with me.

Brief Synopsis: A seemingly ordinary young woman named Rose has a chance encounter with killer mannequins and a strange man named "The Doctor." She handles the excitement well and is rewarded with the chance to accompany the Doctor on his adventures through time and space.

Five Words: Good, but trying too hard.

Introductions: The Ninth Doctor(D9). Rose and her supporting cast of Mickey and Jackie.

REVIEW

There's no getting around the fact that the first episode is a bit wet and floppy, like a fish handshake. The opening is too technoish, shiny modern, "Isn't this very exciting!" Rose is quite watchable but her mom(Jackie) and boyfriend(Mickey) take up time without being very interesting. There are also prominent plotholes, several scenes that don't work, some iffy special effects and a lot of horror movie cliches.

Predictable zombie-like behavior aside, the Autons are great, and despite being a long-neglected entry in the Doctor Who bestiary they perfectly suit the relaunch of the series. Living mannequins are no less disturbing now than they've ever been, and they need no setup and very little explanation. It does end up going a little overboard with the monster trash can and freakish mannequin Mickey. The special effects run past their limits and become jarringly cartoonish.

Besides the Doctor, Rose, Jackie and Mickey, the other notable character here is Clive, a likeable paranoid who's been keeping tabs on the Doctor(somehow only managing to collect unconvincing photoshops of D9's promotional images). Clive is the perfect example of a guy who would love to be a companion if given the chance, but is completely wrong for the role. It's still sad to see him killed off; he's the first example of New Who's tendency to burn through perfectly likeable characters at an alarming rate.

The highlight of "Rose" is the TARDIS reveal, which is absolutely perfect and justifies every awkward moment in the rest of the episode. The power of this great little scene makes good every promise behind the relaunch - it proves that Doctor Who is a timeless show that deserves a rebirth, and it proves that the right people are in charge of the new series, if you'll just give them a chance to hit their stride.

IN RETROSPECT

It's quite weird to watch this first appearance of Mickey Smith and know that he'll actually turn out to be fairly likeable in the final analysis. In this episode he's little more than an easily jettisoned extra from Rose's mundane life. He's good-hearted but not that sharp. Kind of a dope, a little too much of a GUY guy. He'd rather be watching football; he tries too hard to look tough. He seems to be Rose's antithesis, a boring, ordinary human with no potential. Rose's mom Jackie actually makes a better impression here with her bold, comical flirtation with D9.

Christopher Eccleston is fantastic, of course, but I regret that his Doctor isn't written much differently than David Tennant's. He's manic, a fast-talking man of action, makes too many wiseass remarks. Other than shades of angst and sarcasm, they behave pretty much the same. And obviously it's a shame Eccleston didn't get more episodes.

The Doctor is kind of bizarrely cheerful in this episode. Part of that is his love of danger and his enjoyment of Rose's company, but it seems a bit out of character compared to the rest of the upcoming season. Ultimately, a small flaw for a first episode. Maybe D9 is just trying too hard to cover up his universe-supporting angst.

THE BIGGER PICTURE

While "Rose" has its flaws, it wisely avoids the mistakes of the previous attempt at a relaunch - the 1996 TV movie. It doesn't try to explain anything more than the crucial facts you need in order to understand what the show is about. Like the best geek-to-mass-media conversions - say, the Spider-Man or Iron Man movies - it gives fans the faithfulness to the original that they want(within reason) but it doesn't compromise on entertainment value in order to deliver fan service. Not only do we not hear words like "Gallifrey," "Daleks," or "Chameleon Circuit," time travel doesn't even get mentioned except as the last temptation to get Rose to come on board the TARDIS - and the result is that every drop of continuity that appears is a treasure for new and old fans alike.

D9's callousness toward Mickey is a bit surprising here. It is unapologetically elitist behavior from the Doctor, who in other situations has often celebrated the common man. It shows that he's become jaded by his experiences, and it's a hint of a theme we'll see recurring in future episodes: The Doctor needs a companion to remind him what it's like for normal people.

FIRSTS

First new episode since 1989!

First new Doctor since 1996!

First Autons since 1971!

First It's Bigger on the Inside for the new series.

First onscreen "fan" of the Doctor. Not counting the kid from The Greatest Show in the Galaxy who makes metacomments like "I know it's not as good as it used to be..."

SCOREKEEPING

Does the Doctor save the day in this one? No. Well, he provides the antiplastic and saves Rose early on, but is taken prisoner in the climactic confrontation.

Does he inspire someone else to save the day? Yep, Rose plays hero at the climax. This marks the start of a trend for D9.

Nice Person Who Talks To Rose And Dies: Clive

Best Scene: Bigger on the inside.

Funniest Moment: "I'm in my dressing gown. Anything could happen."

Cheesiest: The independently moving mannequin arm with its magical powers of levitation and leverage. The Doctor spends an awful lot of time wrestling feebly with the Autons in the climactic scene, too.

Most Emotional: When Rose says "No" to the Doctor there is such a sense of drear existential horror. It's a moment that lasts just long enough to make you feel really depressed before turning back around for the happy ending.

The Gaiman Award For Fanciful World-Building: The Shadow Proclamation. Who's proclaiming what now? If it's so shadowy how does anyone know about it?

Woeful Cliches: The Crawling Hand. Or how about the door that slams shut to trap the heroine, operated by no visible (or conceivable) party? After a lifetime of Zelda videogames I've grown a bit tired of that one. Also, why do horror movie monsters always move really slowly at first, then speed up the instant the heroes start to run?

And finally, the Big Episode Rating List, part 1:

1. Rose

Now wasn't that exciting? Stay tuned for more reviews.

Extremely Minor Tips For Better Living

It is a well-established fact that the first Traveling Wilburys album is better than the second, whether it's due to the randomness of inspiration, the loss of Roy Orbison, or some mysterious magical chemical that must have been floating around the atmosphere in 1988. But if you listen to both albums together on shuffle, the differences disappear and you have one big chunk of good old-fashioned enjoyable music.

Eden: Heartfelt Reactionary Utopia

Eden is among the truest of myths. It is human nature to remember a better place in a better time, and to extrapolate from that the existence of a long-lost utopia. Perhaps it is because we sense the hand of entropy drawing us down inexorably. More likely it is an adaptation, an evolutionary counterweight to our curiosity and wanderlust.

Eden is the memory of simplicity. It is childhood innocence shared by all and converted into an explanation. Before we knew sex and sin we sought each other innocently, explored our world, named everything in it because that is our nature. Adam must have found Eve attractive before the fall; he just didn't know what to do about it yet. He must have teased her putting snakes in her hair and spiders in her fig leaf.

Eden is a knowable mystery and a conquerable wilderness. It is not civilized or entirely safe but it is an easy environment for humans to dominate. Like a video game, it presents just enough challenge to make us happy. Link goes looking for Zelda and she disappears as soon as she is found - isn't it really a game of hide and seek? Link, again, doesn't know what to do with Zelda when he finds her. And if there is a role for God in this story it would have to be the evil man who keeps them apart, because there are only three characters, and the evil man represents Power.

Some will say that the lesson of the story is that you should be obedient to God(i.e. Power) but the real lesson is Ignorance is Bliss, so long as you live somewhere that is forgiving to the ignorant.

In An Axiom Far Far Away

The Mandalorian Principle: Audiences love what is compelling but not explained.

The Midichlorian Counterprinciple: Audiences do not love what is explained but not compelling.

What I Miss About TV

What I miss about TV is the random access. TV(with cable) was a great technology for quickly finding engaging content without a particular plan in mind. With the web and podcasts and such you have to go through a process of selection that involves mental effort. I guess what I'm saying is websurfing is a more deliberate pasttime than channel surfing, and the ability to mindlessly explore a limited set of TV channels fills a niche in the modern homo sapien's life that the internet can't quite replace. TV's a little bit like iPod Shuffle, in a way. You turn it on, it delivers content, and you respond with a simple binary decision about whether you're entertained. Even when the eventual conclusion is "Nothing's on," there's a certain satisfaction in having looked, and having exhausted the possibilities. The sense of ennui when it seems that there's "Nothing on" on the internet is, by contrast, infinitely deep. It can go on for hours if you persist in looking, because you know the thing you're looking for is out there somewhere(it always is) but you can't seem to find it, or even quantify it with a Google search.

I suppose Youtube is the obvious counter to this, but somehow I don't spend a lot of time there, even though I do like it. Probably I just need more bandwidth. Which is a funny word, sounds like a word a baby would make up. Bandwidth. Huh.

DS-10 Exegesis

I've been tinkering with Korg DS-10, the generally awesome music creation app for the Nintendo DS. It has some limitations, but it's a surprisingly powerful tool for its modest platform and the touch screen allows for direct input in the style of Korg's Kaoss Pad device.

The method I've been using with DS-10 is to construct loops and instrument/scale sets and then improvise with them. You can hear some of the more interesting results of this work here: DS-10 Exegesis

There will be more of this in the future.